Guest guest Posted October 2, 2009 Report Share Posted October 2, 2009 Hey all, since I left my EMT class out of fear and decided to not give up but postpone it until I have better footing in the present moment and can embrace this fear without flinching, without wanting it to be different than what it is, I've been given sort of opportunities to see if I'm cut out for it. First, 2 weekends ago, my nephew was playing and fell to the ground crying looking like his ankle was sprained. I went over and remembered the trauma assessment process and checked his motor function and sensation in his foot. After doing that, I guess it made him realize he wasn't that hurt and got back up and started playing again. It opened my heart to know how to help in this way. Then I'm walking my dog 2 days ago and this old lady (had to be in her 90s) waves me to come over to her, looking distressed. She believed that her son was unconscious on her couch (then my mind gets ready for the correcting of the ABCs: airway, breathing, circulation), she asks me to go in to check and I walk in and there's nobody there. I try to tell her that but she's shaking and doesn't believe me. I offer to help her in any way and she has me knock on 2 of her neighbors' house and they don't answer. She finally waves someone that she knows and they call her son (the one she thinks is unconscious on the couch) and he comes and while they're waiting for him, I say goodbye and leave. It was weird, I'm feeling a shift in me. I wasn't afraid to help, it wasn't like, oh I should help because it's part of the safeties, it was more of simply how can I help this lady in distress? And after I told her the truth that there was no one in there, I realized that this is the experience she is supposed to be having. So I was just there for her the best I could, I could have done better but it's a learning process and it was my first time. Then yesterday, I'm driving to apply for a job and on the interstate I see that traffic is getting heavy at this one spot. I don't think much of it, so I'm in the center lane and then we pass by an accident, with no EMS personnel, I have this urge to stop to make sure that everything's alright but can't because I'm in the center lane and my mind talked me out of it by saying I have to go a little distance to apply for this job. For the first time, I felt bad that I didn't stop, it wasn't a have to because I will receive good karma, it was a want to coming straight from the heart. I'm pretty sure they were fine because it looked like everyone was waiting for the EMS personnel to get there, standing by their cars, and no one was freaking out, like someone was dying. Even though I didn't stop and felt a deep regret, it's amazing, I've never felt this yearning to be of service so deeply. It's like the more I reclaim my authenticity, the more authentic my heart is and the more authentic my motives are. One of the main reasons I left was because I didn't know why I truly wanted to become an EMT, what were my true motives, was it egoic and genuine. I'm starting to realize that I'm leaving behind my old self, or rather I'm gathering up all the pieces of my old selves that I purposefully left behind to try to mold myself into something better, almost like a chameleon so I could become the best at what I sought out to do, and realizing the beauty of my authentic self that needs nothing added to itself. whether this authentic self and Self are the same pointers I don't know, I have a feeling not, but I do have a feeling that it's the reclaiming of the authentic self that brings one to the door and opens it to the Self. But anyways, wanted to share these shifts and unusual occurences happening in me and around me. love to all craig Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 2, 2009 Report Share Posted October 2, 2009 maybe Shakti's answering me, everytime I hear an ambulance I ask Her to help those in need anyway possible, and then I ask Her to teach me how to be of help... , " phoenix.ing9 " <phoenix.ing9 wrote: > > Hey all, since I left my EMT class out of fear and decided to not give up but postpone it until I have better footing in the present moment and can embrace this fear without flinching, without wanting it to be different than what it is, I've been given sort of opportunities to see if I'm cut out for it. First, 2 weekends ago, my nephew was playing and fell to the ground crying looking like his ankle was sprained. I went over and remembered the trauma assessment process and checked his motor function and sensation in his foot. After doing that, I guess it made him realize he wasn't that hurt and got back up and started playing again. It opened my heart to know how to help in this way. > Then I'm walking my dog 2 days ago and this old lady (had to be in her 90s) waves me to come over to her, looking distressed. She believed that her son was unconscious on her couch (then my mind gets ready for the correcting of the ABCs: airway, breathing, circulation), she asks me to go in to check and I walk in and there's nobody there. I try to tell her that but she's shaking and doesn't believe me. I offer to help her in any way and she has me knock on 2 of her neighbors' house and they don't answer. She finally waves someone that she knows and they call her son (the one she thinks is unconscious on the couch) and he comes and while they're waiting for him, I say goodbye and leave. It was weird, I'm feeling a shift in me. I wasn't afraid to help, it wasn't like, oh I should help because it's part of the safeties, it was more of simply how can I help this lady in distress? And after I told her the truth that there was no one in there, I realized that this is the experience she is supposed to be having. So I was just there for her the best I could, I could have done better but it's a learning process and it was my first time. > Then yesterday, I'm driving to apply for a job and on the interstate I see that traffic is getting heavy at this one spot. I don't think much of it, so I'm in the center lane and then we pass by an accident, with no EMS personnel, I have this urge to stop to make sure that everything's alright but can't because I'm in the center lane and my mind talked me out of it by saying I have to go a little distance to apply for this job. For the first time, I felt bad that I didn't stop, it wasn't a have to because I will receive good karma, it was a want to coming straight from the heart. I'm pretty sure they were fine because it looked like everyone was waiting for the EMS personnel to get there, standing by their cars, and no one was freaking out, like someone was dying. Even though I didn't stop and felt a deep regret, it's amazing, I've never felt this yearning to be of service so deeply. It's like the more I reclaim my authenticity, the more authentic my heart is and the more authentic my motives are. One of the main reasons I left was because I didn't know why I truly wanted to become an EMT, what were my true motives, was it egoic and genuine. I'm starting to realize that I'm leaving behind my old self, or rather I'm gathering up all the pieces of my old selves that I purposefully left behind to try to mold myself into something better, almost like a chameleon so I could become the best at what I sought out to do, and realizing the beauty of my authentic self that needs nothing added to itself. whether this authentic self and Self are the same pointers I don't know, I have a feeling not, but I do have a feeling that it's the reclaiming of the authentic self that brings one to the door and opens it to the Self. But anyways, wanted to share these shifts and unusual occurences happening in me and around me. > > love to all > craig > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 2, 2009 Report Share Posted October 2, 2009 I wanted to add this clause that I always add the: IF it's for their highest good, and I never ask for healing of those who don't ask for it, but I do ask for helping energy for Her for those in need, physically. craig , " phoenix.ing9 " <phoenix.ing9 wrote: > > maybe Shakti's answering me, everytime I hear an ambulance I ask Her to help those in need anyway possible, and then I ask Her to teach me how to be of help... > > > , " phoenix.ing9 " <phoenix.ing9@> wrote: > > > > Hey all, since I left my EMT class out of fear and decided to not give up but postpone it until I have better footing in the present moment and can embrace this fear without flinching, without wanting it to be different than what it is, I've been given sort of opportunities to see if I'm cut out for it. First, 2 weekends ago, my nephew was playing and fell to the ground crying looking like his ankle was sprained. I went over and remembered the trauma assessment process and checked his motor function and sensation in his foot. After doing that, I guess it made him realize he wasn't that hurt and got back up and started playing again. It opened my heart to know how to help in this way. > > Then I'm walking my dog 2 days ago and this old lady (had to be in her 90s) waves me to come over to her, looking distressed. She believed that her son was unconscious on her couch (then my mind gets ready for the correcting of the ABCs: airway, breathing, circulation), she asks me to go in to check and I walk in and there's nobody there. I try to tell her that but she's shaking and doesn't believe me. I offer to help her in any way and she has me knock on 2 of her neighbors' house and they don't answer. She finally waves someone that she knows and they call her son (the one she thinks is unconscious on the couch) and he comes and while they're waiting for him, I say goodbye and leave. It was weird, I'm feeling a shift in me. I wasn't afraid to help, it wasn't like, oh I should help because it's part of the safeties, it was more of simply how can I help this lady in distress? And after I told her the truth that there was no one in there, I realized that this is the experience she is supposed to be having. So I was just there for her the best I could, I could have done better but it's a learning process and it was my first time. > > Then yesterday, I'm driving to apply for a job and on the interstate I see that traffic is getting heavy at this one spot. I don't think much of it, so I'm in the center lane and then we pass by an accident, with no EMS personnel, I have this urge to stop to make sure that everything's alright but can't because I'm in the center lane and my mind talked me out of it by saying I have to go a little distance to apply for this job. For the first time, I felt bad that I didn't stop, it wasn't a have to because I will receive good karma, it was a want to coming straight from the heart. I'm pretty sure they were fine because it looked like everyone was waiting for the EMS personnel to get there, standing by their cars, and no one was freaking out, like someone was dying. Even though I didn't stop and felt a deep regret, it's amazing, I've never felt this yearning to be of service so deeply. It's like the more I reclaim my authenticity, the more authentic my heart is and the more authentic my motives are. One of the main reasons I left was because I didn't know why I truly wanted to become an EMT, what were my true motives, was it egoic and genuine. I'm starting to realize that I'm leaving behind my old self, or rather I'm gathering up all the pieces of my old selves that I purposefully left behind to try to mold myself into something better, almost like a chameleon so I could become the best at what I sought out to do, and realizing the beauty of my authentic self that needs nothing added to itself. whether this authentic self and Self are the same pointers I don't know, I have a feeling not, but I do have a feeling that it's the reclaiming of the authentic self that brings one to the door and opens it to the Self. But anyways, wanted to share these shifts and unusual occurences happening in me and around me. > > > > love to all > > craig > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 3, 2009 Report Share Posted October 3, 2009 Craig, Sometimes people who have a genuine call for something have no choice. May you go forward without fear......... Blessings Julie --- On Fri, 10/2/09, phoenix.ing9 <phoenix.ing9 wrote: phoenix.ing9 <phoenix.ing9 shifts happening in me and around me Friday, October 2, 2009, 9:37 PM Hey all, since I left my EMT class out of fear and decided to not give up but postpone it until I have better footing in the present moment and can embrace this fear without flinching, without wanting it to be different than what it is, I've been given sort of opportunities to see if I'm cut out for it. First, 2 weekends ago, my nephew was playing and fell to the ground crying looking like his ankle was sprained. I went over and remembered the trauma assessment process and checked his motor function and sensation in his foot. After doing that, I guess it made him reali= Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 3, 2009 Report Share Posted October 3, 2009 thank you Julie craig , Julie <jewelport wrote: > > Craig, > Sometimes people who have a genuine call for something have no choice. May you go forward without fear......... > > Blessings > > Julie > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.