Relationship problems -Thanks Shrikant-Zinnia

[Guest guest]

I can understand number five in the situation I went through. When it all began

I couldn't understand why they were treating me so horrible. I put all the blame

on myself for not being good enough, became depressed, and could not see things

clearly. I did not know how to change to be what/how they wanted me to be. I

felt helpless.

 

One can only handle so much pain until they are changed by the pain and become

detached maybe like I did. No matter what they did to me or put me through, I

still loved them both just as much as ever. When I stopped blaming myself for it

all, I became detached from their view of me and I changed. I stood up for

myself and we all finally really talked in truths and we all ended up changed

for the good. I do not feel hurt by anything they say or do any longer. When

things rise up we talk and work it out. Through all of that I have learned how

to stay in the observer mode in all the situations and their actions/words no

longer cause me pain.

 

Love being detached,

Linda

 

, zinnia print

<zinniaprint wrote:

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> Shrikant,

> I understand 1 - 4 but not sure of number 5.

> for one example of how this applies to me...

> I was a half sister ... I had wound stories but later I was a step

parent...(the weird kind)First the child then the grown up... adoring both

parents as a child but ended up quite ornery to mother.

> Wait maybe number 5 is how she had to have a lot of self control to handle the

pain and distress I caused her.

> OK I get it.

> Thank you! -Zinnia

>

> shrikantphule

> Sat, 28 Nov 2009 23:52:20 +0530

> Relationship problems

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When you assume and accept, in any relationship that;

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> 1) Unexpected will only happen.

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> 2) He/she will deceive.

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> 3) There will be misunderstanding .

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> 4) He/she may be harassed physically or tortured mentally.

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> 5) His/her attitude may change suddenly, then you have self control,over pain

and distress.

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> EXPECTATIONS ARE CAUSE OF AGONY................shrikant

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