Well this was... weird....

[Guest guest]

Something interesting happened this morning. After a night of intense dreams of

various kinds, I awoke and heard someone talking next to me. The voice was

telling me all kinds of stuff and when I listened in, it was saying weird stuff

about a video game I was playing yesterday. That was when I was like...

hmmmmm....

 

So I changed my thoughts and tried to make it sound evil and it started growling

at me. I was like... weird... its like I am actually hearing a certain part of

my thoughts but hearing it separately. So I got bored and shut it off.

 

At that point I realized I must be going through sleep paralysis, because at

this same time the right side of my back, between my solar plexus and sacral

Chakra was buzzing with intense painful electrical energy.

 

SO, I then opened my eyes and flipped my body over, and wouldn't you know I was

wide awake...

 

I looked around the room seeing if maybe I thought I was awake when I really

wasn't and everything looked normal, I was truly awake.

 

Weird I thought, but what about this pain?

 

I tried to surrender to Shakti and it got intense. I tried to raise my eyes,

and put my tongue up and all it did was make my brow of points twitch something

fierce (the brow area has been doing this a lot lately) and the pain was the

same.

 

I remembered last time this happened. I was advised to work on my relationship

with my divine male. Maybe do something nice, or something, for the men of my

life.

 

That cured it, but this time it is different. These past few days have been

emotionally taxing. I found out about puppy mills and watched peta videos and

footage of slaughter houses and decided to become an advocate for animals. I

turned vegetarian and had sign after sign in the most obvious of synchronicity

that I needed to do this.

 

I have been abstaining from s3x but had dream after dream of having it today. In

my dreams it was an intimacy thing more though... Of hours of joining and

intense pleasure from it. I awoke at various times and felt the s3xual energy

all over my body, from my head to my toes.

 

My back still hurts in that point. It is a specific point and not a muscle area.

 

I don't know what else I need to do..

 

Should I back off on this path? Should I quit being over compassionate for

animals and let go of joining peta and becoming a full blown advocate, even if

just temporarily? Should I stop abstaining from my husband? Its only been a week

but still... (and he doesn't mind, he is very supportive)

 

I have been abstaining because I felt that I needed to detach and focus on

myself. I thought it sound advice not to have s3x, but perhaps that wasn't good

for ME to do. Is that it?

 

Could there be more psychically than just having to do with the male aspect,

considering the phenomenon that occurred whilst awake today?

 

I am confused....

 

I have been practicing the safeties, eating pretty much ONLY potatoes hah.

 

Chrism, if you can give me some advice I would appreciate it. The pain is not

subtle...

 

 

Thanks,

-Tiffany S