Guest guest Posted January 20, 2010 Report Share Posted January 20, 2010 Hello everyone, I want to thank you all for your concern, your healing, your prayers, encouragement, love, compassion, caring, the list goes on and on. I am feeling a lot better today, three days since, and seeing my son return to as close to normal as possible under these conditions has brought a great deal of relief. Of course all of the replies really help too. His diagnosis is between a Class 1 and 2, 6-8 weeks recovery, which consists of nothing more than basically rest. He should have full use and feel close to normal before the 6-8 weeks, but the internal healing will take longer than how it " feels " . We were warned that although he may feel fine and be eager to go again, the internals won't be ready yet and any further injury has the potential to cause greater harm. He's about totally crushed that his season could likely be over, he so loves the hockey. Hopefully shakti has plans for him to return to the ice before what the medical books say. Shaz, I was tingling when I read your email. I can't express to you how much you nailed my emotions, thoughts and feelings. Especially this line of yours " you feel remorse even through the roar of instinct to protect your son. " YES! I do feel bad for my thoughts, the anger, the emotions. If I followed my own logic further, then I would not be human, for emotions are very " human " . Possibly I was being too hard on myself, possibly not, I don't know. By having the anger, is that " failure " ?(not trying to get hung up on succeeding/failing, winning/losing... no ego trip here just trying to reason). Is a human emotion considered taboo? You are right, I did nothing in the way of acting out, it was the anger that raged instantaneously that caused me to feel like I have quite a ways to go. Or *did* I learn it by not acting out? Are we supposed to be non-emotional droids? I don't know. Thanks again to everyone! Love Bill , " shaktiaz " <shaktiaz wrote: > > Hi Bill, > > I've been sitting with your email a few hours, letting it sink in. > > Like all the rest of us here who love you so much, I too rushed to reassure you, but as the hours go by, the echo of the question implied by your lament stays with me. > > Your pain and sense of having failed a test speak to your great compassion. You show great sensitivity in that you feel remorse even through the roar of instinct to protect your son. I think there is wisdom in your sensitivity and review. > > I've been taught that our thoughts, when accompanied by strong emotion, carry great power, for good or ill. That we must learn to dance with our Shadow, marry our Shadow, so as not to unintentionally inflict harm on others when something triggers our emotions. > > I suspect this is the source of your regret. Is that correct? > > It is said that what carries Power to completion is when our actions align with focussed intention and strong emotion. Since you did not act on your anger and bring it to completion, I imagine there is no harm done. But if you are still concerned, you might could undo any harm by revisualizing the scene while holding great love in your heart, and act on that, thus bringing it to completion. > > I don't know if this is on the mark or off, but I thought I would put it out there. Thank you for sharing your experience and your big heart with us, Bill. > > Peace and Blessings on you and your K-eyed son. > > Hugs, > Shaz > --- Bill wrote: > > > But anyway, although I was very reserved and in control, I really wasn't thinking nice things about the bigger kid who did it, and more importantly his parents. I didn't want to hurt anyone, as if I could if I wanted to, but I just wanted to scream at the kids' parents. I almost feel as though it was a test and I failed. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 20, 2010 Report Share Posted January 20, 2010 Hi Bill, >Possibly I was being too hard on myself, possibly not, I don't know. By having the >anger, is that " failure " ?(not trying to get hung up on succeeding/failing, >winning/losing... no ego trip here just trying to reason). I think you did fine. I'm no expert. Currently I'm finding that the purpose/role of our emotions is an interesting question for me. One phrase that I have found quite helpful to me is: " The weather is not the sky " or " The weather does not make the sky " . If our emotions are the weather then they are natural, to be experienced - a reaction that naturally arises and disperses acording to environmental factors. They naturally arise within the vault of our selves. They are not the vault - they are not our essential nature - merely transient responses. Cheers rob -- > > [Kundalini- > Awakening-Systems-1 ] On Behalf Of William > 20 January 2010 14:49 > > Re: (maybe) I failed > > Hello everyone, > I want to thank you all for your concern, your healing, your prayers, > encouragement, love, compassion, caring, the list goes on and on. > > I am feeling a lot better today, three days since, and seeing my son > return to as close to normal as possible under these conditions has > brought a great deal of relief. Of course all of the replies really > help too. > > His diagnosis is between a Class 1 and 2, 6-8 weeks recovery, which > consists of nothing more than basically rest. He should have full use > and feel close to normal before the 6-8 weeks, but the internal healing > will take longer than how it " feels " . We were warned that although he > may feel fine and be eager to go again, the internals won't be ready > yet and any further injury has the potential to cause greater harm. > He's about totally crushed that his season could likely be over, he so > loves the hockey. Hopefully shakti has plans for him to return to the > ice before what the medical books say. > > Shaz, I was tingling when I read your email. I can't express to you > how much you nailed my emotions, thoughts and feelings. Especially > this line of yours > " you feel remorse even through the roar of instinct to protect your > son. " > > YES! > > I do feel bad for my thoughts, the anger, the emotions. If I followed > my own logic further, then I would not be human, for emotions are very > " human " . > > Possibly I was being too hard on myself, possibly not, I don't know. > By having the anger, is that " failure " ?(not trying to get hung up on > succeeding/failing, winning/losing... no ego trip here just trying to > reason). Is a human emotion considered taboo? You are right, I did > nothing in the way of acting out, it was the anger that raged > instantaneously that caused me to feel like I have quite a ways to go. > Or *did* I learn it by not acting out? Are we supposed to be non- > emotional droids? I don't know. > > > Thanks again to everyone! > Love > Bill > > , " shaktiaz " > <shaktiaz wrote: > > > > Hi Bill, > > > > I've been sitting with your email a few hours, letting it sink in. > > > > Like all the rest of us here who love you so much, I too rushed to > reassure you, but as the hours go by, the echo of the question implied > by your lament stays with me. > > > > Your pain and sense of having failed a test speak to your great > compassion. You show great sensitivity in that you feel remorse even > through the roar of instinct to protect your son. I think there is > wisdom in your sensitivity and review. > > > > I've been taught that our thoughts, when accompanied by strong > emotion, carry great power, for good or ill. That we must learn to > dance with our Shadow, marry our Shadow, so as not to unintentionally > inflict harm on others when something triggers our emotions. > > > > I suspect this is the source of your regret. Is that correct? > > > > It is said that what carries Power to completion is when our actions > align with focussed intention and strong emotion. Since you did not act > on your anger and bring it to completion, I imagine there is no harm > done. But if you are still concerned, you might could undo any harm by > revisualizing the scene while holding great love in your heart, and act > on that, thus bringing it to completion. > > > > I don't know if this is on the mark or off, but I thought I would put > it out there. Thank you for sharing your experience and your big heart > with us, Bill. > > > > Peace and Blessings on you and your K-eyed son. > > > > Hugs, > > Shaz > > --- Bill wrote: > > > > > But anyway, although I was very reserved and in control, I really > wasn't thinking nice things about the bigger kid who did it, and more > importantly his parents. I didn't want to hurt anyone, as if I could > if I wanted to, but I just wanted to scream at the kids' parents. I > almost feel as though it was a test and I failed. > > > > > > > --- > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 20, 2010 Report Share Posted January 20, 2010 Hi Bill, I don't think we are " supposed " to be anything. I think we are souls living in a body with all its instincts, hungers, needs and capacity for beauty. I think the marriage of body and soul stretch us both to become something more than each would be alone. I remember reading an account of a yogi, a master, a swami, who burst into tears and wailed at the news that his beloved student had died. This, I believe, is the essence of being human. We may remember our past lives, we may experience Unity, we may recall our experiences of death and rebirth, but still we cry when a loved one is injured or passes from this world of limitation. That is Love made earthly. That is the beauty of this marriage of body and soul. Peace to you, and Joy. Shaz --- William wrote: I did nothing in the way of acting out, it was the anger that raged instantaneously that caused me to feel like I have quite a ways to go. Or *did* I learn it by not acting out? Are we supposed to be non-emotional droids? I don't know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.