Points to Ponder in 2003

[atma]

1. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person

to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

 

2. Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but

you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

 

3. I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end

and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen."

 

4. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals

dying of nothing.

 

5. The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an

argument going.

 

6. Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one

talks about seeing UFOs like they use to.

 

7. According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice

about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice

about men is they're a bunch of liars.

 

8. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

 

9. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention

to criticism.

 

10. Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred

dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

 

11. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world

is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

 

12. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come

to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to t