I will simply try to cultivate my humility and chant the Holy Name

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An Embarrassing Predicament

 

BY GOPAKUMAR DAS

 

In this world we find ourselves in an embarrassing predicament. This predicament is such that it distorts our vision and makes us behave in a manner not befitting a spiritual being. However, the nature of our spiritual self is such that it can be influenced in such a bewildering manner. Due to such a tendency towards bewilderment we find ourselves in deplorable situations, regardless of whether we are part of a bonafide spiritual tradition or not. In this regard it is so unfortunate to find ourselves fallen into a darkness of hedonism in our ambition to be happy. It is unfortunate because it is a truly unattainable ambition. But this is not the entire picture either. There is another angle of vision. This angle of vision is more palatable to the spiritual seeker who senses that the environment is not unfriendly when we have surrendered ourselves at the feet of Sri Guru and Gauranga.

 

The modes of material nature have been spoken of at length by our venerable acharyas and we have listened, sometimes reluctantly, to their discourses concerning them. But it is likely that we have not stopped to think or better yet perceive how they are affecting us in our daily living. See, the fact is that our acharyas were not speaking about some dogma that is theoretical and unperceivable to the material eye. The modes of nature are affecting me in writing this article and you in reading it. This is the predicament I am speaking of. We are in a more or less powerless situation against the modes of nature in which we are little more than a puppet tangled in its strings. These material modes of nature are just a fraction of the Lord's energy and we are completely powerless against them. Ambitions derived from their influence are deluding. They delude us into believing that they are attainable. For example, influenced in the mode of passion we can come to believe that finding the right job or love affair will culminate in utter bliss and satisfaction. This belief is so deluded that after countless experiences to the contrary we still fall under its grip. So what, you might ask, is that other angle of vision of which you speak? Humility.

 

What a poor idea of humility we have cultivated in the western world. We think that the humble person can have no self-worth and acknowledges every soul as absolutely superior to him in every respect. This is not the humility of which the Gaudiya Vaisnavas speak. In fact, the humility of which I will speak is still not the furthest reach of humility that the Gaudiyas speak of either. It is a beginning humility that places us on the correct platform from which we can bear some fruit in our spiritual practice. See the humility we often anticipate is nothing more that a psychological dysfunction called worthlessness or a severe low self-esteem. From this position we cannot truly function. It is inherently a dis-functional position. The humility we have to recognize is different. It is in our most fallen condition, when it has become apparent that we are being dragged here and there by the demands of our senses and the modes of material nature that we can begin to see our powerlessness to just a fraction of the Lord's energy. In this condition we can find our humility, a powerlessness in relation to the Absolute.

 

This is not a completely hopeless situation. In our humility we can place ourselves into the care of Sri Krsna, of whom the modes are subservient, living a life influenced by sattva guna and come under His control. We decide under which of His energies we will submit ourselves. If we submit to His lesser manifestation of the material modes then we will find ourselves again tangled within its demanding strings. To live a sattvic life is not a bad thing. It is the essence of Vedic living, which we so frequently theorize towards and often fall short of. But it is an achievable ideal if understood essentially. If we try to live such a life while practicing the dharma of Krsna nama sankirtana and kindness to others, we will be behaving in such a way that the Absolute, Sri Krsna will find our separation unbearable. The super hero can rescue even the most hopeless victim. He can plunge into the hottest fires and break through the most impenetrable barriers. But how much easier will it be for him if we are standing on the roof of a burning building, hopelessly and tearfully crying out his name. We must first realize we are in the burning building, understand our predicament, admit our defeat and then place ourselves in the sole care of the Supreme super hero. Do we believe He exists?

 

I admit defeat. I have been beat here and there by my senses. I will undoubtedly again be dragged here and there. I will simply try to cultivate my humility and chant the Holy Name. If I can do this with the humility of a blade of grass, which bends when stepped upon, hopeless to resist, nevertheless bouncing right back, then I believe I can be successful.