Fake Yogis and Sadhus

[Haridham]

Just at the beggining of this past year my parents wanted me to get married in india. Now marriage is not a bad thing but i just said i want to marry a devotee and they just thought i was crazy.

 

Anyways since they thought i was crazy they thought i should do some puja, which i didnt want to do cause i only follow prabhupads movement.

 

So they took me to some yogis ashram to do some yagna.

 

Some of this is quite funny i hope i dont offend anyone.

 

This guy was some old "hindu" pujari who thought he knew everything.

 

He told me that he was really powerful and he could help me from stop going crazy with the hare krsna's.

 

I was wondering if he could help me from stop laughing so hard long enough to not soil my pants.

 

He said you should get married and i should listen to him because he is not only a normal everyday indian yogis he was a yogi which could invite my "ancestors", and "demigoddes" into his body.

 

He told me that that five thousand years ago i was a main cowherd boy with krsna..i chuckled a bit but then thought if this were true i woudnt be here now and most likey with krsna.....anyway things got more interesting.

 

He said he had a degree in MBA, a bussiness degree and some law degree. So I asked him "how about a degree in B.S.(those of you not from northamerica it means bull sh"t) and he was like "what is that" So i said "u know, B.S., it seems what you are saying is a lot of B.S" He didnt understand so i let it go.

 

So the next we go to the fire yagna. ALl of a sudden he started to shake and he said one of your ancestors has enterted his body. I chuckled but my parents were foolish enough to believe it.

 

Funny enough, they were telling us how in terrible shape you are in and the only way to get help was that this yogi has to do more yagnas which ofcourse would cost a few thousand rupees. Wow, my ancestors knew how to do bussiness.

 

Anyways, after he stoped shaking and while i was still trying not to laugh he told me that I have always born in my family lineage and i have an eternel duty to them. Funny how he said a few minutes ago he said i was born as krsna's friends....wow this guys are very trustworthy.

 

Anyways, after he started to yell at me about how i should stop following Prabhupad and how my Guru(Gopal Krsna Maharaj)wasnt a real guru cause he didnt possess any "magical powers" and a real guru can have ashes coming out of his head or something i thought I finally should say something.

 

I said "hmmmm....you know..anger is not a spiritual quality. Its quite in the mode of ignorance"

 

That shut him but for a bit only to come out and say to my parents "They(iskcon) tell him to say this"

 

Anyways he said chanting wasnt importand, getting married and collecting a lot of money was important.

 

He then said that look at Mirabai. She left her husband and family for krsna. What kind of nonsense is that.

 

I said "ee Mirabai was a devotee of krsna. She had something called bhakti and she was in the mode of goodness. You are in the mode of ignorance nor are you a devotee so you arent qualified to understand this"

 

After another frown and look of disbelief, he said these are my devotees(he was saying discpiles but since he was an idiot we should let that go)pointing to some lady who was serving him. So i asked " are you a guru" He said "yeah" I said can i see your magical powers? He was baffled but then said i can have demigoddes enter into my body. I said oh yeah you have a degree in b.s. Ofcourse you can do that.

 

I asked him "how he became a guru" He said "I just am"

 

I replied "actually inorder to become a guru u must first be given sanyass by your own guru, you just cant become a guru" He said again "thats what they tell you dont they"

 

I said yeah, "thats what the bagavat gita and Srimad Bagavatam state.

 

Another frown.

 

I just told him "you can fool many people but you cant fool me my friend"

 

Anyways my parents believed that .. To top it off he had goddess Kali come into him.

 

I am glad Srila Prabhupad is our Savior because there are so many people out there who dont know the scriptures and will believe anything they see or hear.

 

Hare krsna.

Haridham

[Govindaram]

"I am glad Srila Prabhupad is our Savior because there are so many people out there who dont know the scriptures and will believe anything they see or hear."

 

Yes, but don't frown upon people please, teach them

about Krishna.. and also this so called 'Guru' you were talking with

well you should show a bit more of respect,

by your example he could change his mind, instead of

trying to be clever and too high and mighty.

 

I can see you have a sense of humour, and it comes

across in your post(dubious)(lol), so I may be

wrong in what I say, but hey I've said it!