Guest guest Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 I give up on this god and his pure bs. I stoped doing drugs and I stoped going after my desires, and what I got out of it is just get myself deeper into this piece of . hole i have digged myself in, none likes me noone wants to talk to me, but is alright i dont give a ., . krishna, let him kill me now, if he truly excist Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Yeah, thats it - blame your problems on God. Challenge His existence too. Oh, like He's really out to kill you. So you gave up your physical anarthas and are wondering why Krishna didn't come swooping down on a swan to fix your life. And your mind needs no fixin? Hey, you only did step number one. You've got much furhter to go! The responsibility is yours, not Gods. You got in a hole cuz you aren't addressing your own issues. And it doesn't sound like youre doing KC right either. Have you been reading Prabhuapda's books daily? Chanting daily? Getting into better association? Rising early? Etc.? If you want THAT much change in your life, YOU must do that much change. Good luck. YS, Prtha dd Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gHari Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 They just don't want to listen to you. Let them sleep; they like their dreams. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priitaa Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Well, I felt sorry for the guy - or gal. When people stop doing drugs, then all the reasons they started doing them in the first place, start to flood them. The drugs were numbing them out, often to the point where they forget why they started. Or the drugs take on such a life of their own the person forgets they had other problems too, UNTIL they get clean. So I thought maybe a rude awakening might help. Or not. And the whole concept of stopping going after their desires, where the heck did they get the idea THAT is Krishna consciousness? It sounds more like Impersonalism or even Mayavadi. We can't become desireless, we can only develop the 'right' desires. Therefore I pointed out the importance of reading Prabhupada's books daily. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 I give up on this god and his pure bs. I stoped doing drugs and I stoped going after my desires Gee, sounds like you made a big mistake? Maybe you should go back to the drugs.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danava Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 I had lots of pain because of God. not because He was guilty but because I wanted to manipulate Him. Funny? Indeed. /images/graemlins/smile.gif I was 14 or 15 maybe that was my early days knowing about Sri Krishna or maybe that was even before. I was standing in the middle of fast mauntin stream and fishing. It was dark. I dont remeber why but I has prayed very sincerelly "God, if you exists please appear here.." Not only He didn't but in addition I had lost one of my sandals /images/graemlins/smile.gif Yes God is cruel /images/graemlins/smile.gif /images/graemlins/smile.gif It was in univercity, first year. We had harinama in city. As usually our temple brachmacharis /images/graemlins/smile.gif somehow or another didnt figured out that in this day some cristians have kind of fast. West of Ukraine where it was is very 'religious'. Immagine meateaters havn't their meal for all the day and just came out from church where they are daily instructed about devils /images/graemlins/smile.gif Well that candidates to inhabitant of hell planets attacked us. Thhaaatt was a fighhhttt /images/graemlins/smile.gif Since I am crazy person by nature I was in the avangard. So was hardly kicked to the ground and have gotten several hard kicks. Thanks to bhaktas they have me saved. So I've got "concussion of the brain". So I had skiped some important tests in the University. Why? "Well I sacrifized so much for Sri Krishna, He will take care" I think you've guessed -- I was flied out from the University /images/graemlins/smile.gif Oh I was angryyyy..... But I had some time so I quickly transfered myself to another high school. Where instead of atteding lessons and practical works I was attending Sri Krishna's temple where I was sometimes engaged into patato peeling. When they asked what about exams and tests I answered -- Krishna will do that for me /images/graemlins/smile.gif Stupid me... Again kicked out.. Then if you dont study at certified high school you have to go to army. Ukrainian army equals to Ukrainian jail. That was disaster. I never smoked before (well 1/2 of cigaret when I was 6 and maybe 1 in the preschool or something like that). Now I was 18, and had to go to !@# army. I was so angry on Sri Krishna so I opened refrigirator and has found a piece of salamy (my mother eats it) so I said "Ahhaa! Now I am going to eat it!! You see-- I am braking Your principle!!" Now I am laughing writting it but those times... Also I have found somewhere a box of cigaretes and started to smoke! And I told that from now on my Lord is lord Shiva! Shiva cares about his followers /images/graemlins/smile.gif etc I dont remember if I stopped this b.s. in the same day or it continued for a while. I remember when everything failed and I was about to run away from the city an old lady appeared fixed all the documents manipulated somehow with army authorities and I was released... mirracle. And she never asked for money. Hm... when I was last time angry on Sri Krishna? ... Ah yes. I had done something to my backbone. You can't imagine that pain. That was a few years ago. You cant seat you cant lie you cant breathe. Every move -- biggest pain. "Krishna!! Krishna!!! !@#, !@# why !@#!@ do You need this?? sh**t" Do you think He had appeared and cured my backbone?? No. Yes. I had called local 911 doctors came did some massage, turned my head in one direction in another, hads here etc etc just in 3 minuted I was back to life... Finally after all this stories I realized one important thing -- I will never blame Lord of my heart -- Sri Krishna, Hrishikesha, Govinda, Narayana. It was me who has fallen into this world of painful dreams. Me and only me is responsible bast*rd who deserved this pain. Why do I blame Krishna? He is the doctor He is trying His best to cure me. Yes it is paynful sometimes. After I have decided to never blame Sri Govinda for my bad karma I have peace of mind /images/graemlins/smile.gif I live my life sometimes I suffer sometimes enjoy. I hope I love Krishna or at least that love is groving somewhere inside the heart. I am sure that guy with flute loves me too. To make some friends try to think about yourself are you good friend yourseves? Or maybe you should change your association? If your friends are drug users and you are so lucky that you have stopped then maybe you need to find some Hare Krishna friends? With best wishes, a deamon. ------------------ Krishna thank You, You are my real friend, You have to suffer so much because of me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Govindaram Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Haribol! I have to admit also I have many times got angry at Krishna, (i'd like to think it was in a 'rasa'), but its pure ignorance really, I do regret when I do it, but its sweet in a way also that we can get angry at the one we like, (notice I didn't use the word love), I have still have loads of anger inside me, which is only a lack of love for krishna, funny or what?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cRimAl Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Dandavats, Hahaha, I like this thread, it's familiar. You know, ever since I got into KC in the middle of the 90's I have gotten angry at Krishna a few times, in fact, I was even disussing it with my friend this morning, and how stupid it was to blame someone else but me. I even took it all the way to where I threw away all my books, imagine that...Did it help ? Nope, I just had to re-buy all those books that I lost... Now I still get angry at Krishna sometimes but I try to realize as fast as I can that it's me that I need to get upset at...I'm the one that's not perfect not Krishna. And one thing I can say: Krishna takes care of his devotees. You may not alwways see it right away but He does and even pain can be a useful tool on the path to perfection. And drugs: I've done them all: LSD, speed, weed, alcohol, cigarettes and you know what, no matter how high you get you WILL have to come down again and each and every time you do drugs the getting down becomes harder. Now I live without all that stuff and to tell you the truth, it rules ! Fact is: life in the material world will never be easy but we can make it easier and turning to Krishna, surrendering our whole soul and heart to Krishna is the only way to make it easier and hey, you don't have to come down of that high... I know that I will try my hardest to never go back again to the life that was pulling my straight down into misery and I sincerely hope you'll be able to do the same. And if you need to talk to someone just say so...I'm sure that there's lots of people here that will be more than willing to talk to you, I know that I'm one of them. YS haribol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danava Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Thank you, there is a little continuation to my story: ..due to I was kicked from university I was for a year engaged in ukrainian line of BBT, the best year in my life. There I had time to study computers and programming. Then I came back to Ukraine and was employed as a programmer. Now I am director, 50% "shareholder" of UK company "Mycell Innovations ltd". So even in material plane it is better to be with Krishna because in everyway He is the best friend! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Very nice, it is like listening to my own thoughts. This is my biggest obstacle, that whenever there is trouble, I start to lose my faiht and become angry at Krishna. I also sold all my books two times, and I had to buy them again (for a higher price of course). I was so angry at God that I became a Buddhist and for years I tried to rejoice in denying His existence. But it just does not work... So now I am trying to accept whatever He arranges for me. Not easy, I have to admit... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cRimAl Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 So nice to read that i'm not the only one that made the mistake of selling my books. /images/graemlins/wink.gif I also flirted with Buddhism for a while but that's just not for me. I love Krishna way too much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2004 Report Share Posted February 10, 2004 I am sorry, I do not meant what I said in the first post, a few days have passed, and the fog has been lifted, My love to lord krishna is to strong, for hate, fear, and anger to ever destroye it. hare krishna, this thread is my mistake Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priitaa Posted February 10, 2004 Report Share Posted February 10, 2004 Hey, you deserve a good pat on the back for the courage to admit that. AND for coming out of the fog. As you have seen by the various posts, many have gone thru such a fog! You are not alone. Just hang in there. /images/graemlins/smile.gif Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 11, 2004 Report Share Posted February 11, 2004 I wonder why you are picking on this poor kid, who obviously needs help. Instead of castigating him, you might want to help him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priitaa Posted February 11, 2004 Report Share Posted February 11, 2004 Picking on him? Did you NOT read my last post? Or everyone elses posts? No one is picking on him. Quite the opposite! My goodness, I just told him congratulations for coming out of denial and that everyone has gone thru hard times. Maybe you need to reread the posts to properly understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 11, 2004 Report Share Posted February 11, 2004 Reread it? Then you rewrite it! lol. Seriously, reread YOUR first post where you attacked this poor man for asking advice. If you can't help, at least don't hinder. Leave it to us spiritual professionals, okay? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Priitaa Posted February 12, 2004 Report Share Posted February 12, 2004 My FIRST post is all you can see? And you're just *now* commenting on it? Where were you on the 9th when it was originally put up? Anyhow, I take nothing back I said in my first post. When anyone writes the words God (Krsna) in the same sentence with "bs" they are going to get that type of reply from me. Some people need a wake up call, and for that matter, I felt if he got one he WOULD change his attitude. Now, another poster said worse than I did - to just return to drugs. Nor am I criticizing that (& not agreeing). But then the rest of the posts are different, once the path had been cleared. Seems to me you are seeing anything less than perfect, or according to your perception. If what you are speaking is your mehtod, where are 'your' encouraging words? All I hear is chastizement. It's not like you're practicing what you're preaching. You who are so wise that you can't sign your name, who do you consider to fit in the category of a 'professional?' You? So who is your guru - the parampara your knowledge is coming from? And your training - how did you aquire your spiriutal training? Did you move into the asrhama to get it and therefore can judge me and tell me how to preach or not preach? What are your qualifications. Please tell me. To the first poster only: Please dont take anything I have said here personally. It is not to you, but to "guest." I feel you are very sincere and just had a down day, or week, or even month, but pulled yourself out of it. For that you deserve much credit! /images/graemlins/smile.gif Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 12, 2004 Report Share Posted February 12, 2004 hey, don't throw in the towel just yet. u have been in this material world for many lifes in variety of forms. it takes many lifes to become fully god concious, Krsna concious. so hang in there some more brother... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danava Posted February 12, 2004 Report Share Posted February 12, 2004 Jaya Sri Krishna! Jaya Sri Radhe!! Jaya Dear Guest!! It is always like that. These days for 3 days I had pain in my tooth. Three days of discomfort. I am just from dentist had very nice service with anaesthesia so where is that fog of pain I had for 3 days? Nowhere. But Krishna remains /images/graemlins/smile.gif I am very happy you have changed your mood Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 18, 2004 Report Share Posted February 18, 2004 Is Christianity the religion of untruth? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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