Bad haircut pushes one into the abyss

[Guest guest]

This might sound a little strange, but I am very serious in my inquiry and I don;t want anyone laughing at me. I am too sensitive for that. Anyway, here goes nothing. I used to believe in krsna, i've also read BG. In the final chapter, Krsna asks his devotees to surrender, and he'll take care of evrythnig. I understood that to mean that one should give up oneself (motvies etc.) to the lord of the sacrifice; or something like that.

 

Now here's the interesting part. Recently, I had a haircut and the idiot had cut my hair in such a way I couldn't even recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. It was awful. People were laughing, as I got home. I was quite oblivious to it, as I didn't know then..i hadn;t looked in the mirror. ANyway, when I went home and saw my hair, I almost collapsed. I couldn't part it in the middle or in the sides, couldn't brush it back. In short, I couldn't brush the damn thing AT ALL, it was a complete and total mess. I felt the urge to kill myself. Luckily, I controlled myself and went to the same guy, demanded another cut, a good one this time, I could've killed him, so angry was I! Fortunately, the second time was pretty good and my hair started looking cool once again. I was happy.

 

On the way home, I couldnt help but wonder: I surrendered last week, and this is the punishment krsna gives me this week. What kind of religion is that? I was made to suffer the most intolerable hell, worse than death and pain, it was horrifying, just looking at my hair after the first cut. I nearly died. Is this how god treats devotees, giving them bad haircuts and heart attacks?

 

WHat to do? DOn;t think this is some superficial thing. To me, it is damn important. How can I get myself to believe when even a thing as trivial as haircut leads to disaster??? If god can't even give me cool hair, how is he going to give me wisdom and peace? It has been bugging me all this time, and I need answers from sincere devotees, not from people who laugh at another man's tears. Is that clear?

 

Ex-Vaishnav from India

[Avinash]

This post is just to ask a question. It is neither to laugh at you nor to agree with you.

 

You have signed your post as "Ex-Vaishnav from India". I understand that bad hair cut led you into trouble. But, you must have faced far bigger problems in life. Then, how is it that you believed in Krsna earlier?

[gHari]

When you don't let Krsna take you to His barber, then some evil envious fool makes you look like a chump. How can Krsna protect us when we don't let Him?

 

I've cut my own hair for the last dozen years, after my barber had a baby and retired. But I too have a fetish about my hair, and every time I shower I remember the most intimate moment of my life with Krsna as I let the water pour over my head. Then I just let it dry without touching it. It took me a while to trust and not mess with the brush when it looked odd. It always ends up cool, or cool enough for me.

 

When I move my feet without Krsna, I know I'll only find trouble. That empty world is full of serpents and villains ready to teach me my place.

 

 

[theist]

The mind gets focused on such a tiny postion of the picture. Expand it a little. We have bad hair days. But we ignore the fact that we have been having bad body days for millions of births. Give a pig the latest sylyish cut and does he become happy? Walking around eating stool with his blow dryed cut.

 

You have been given a human form and you have some attraction to Krsna. Please don't waste that. We all go through our own versions of your experience. Societies pressures can seem all important at the time. But don't blame God. We chose to live in the material world and even now Krsna is willing to free us from all such miseries.

 

I got tired of even going to the barber and sitting there. The whole routine is somewhat absurd. So I bought this little vacuum thing that enables me to cut it myself. Works fine enough.

 

Like gHari I keep it short enough so I don't have to think about it. Keep it clean but otherwise forget about it.

 

 

[Raghavan]

An haircut is just a minor thing one would ever imagine. For this reason did you feel like killing yourself and also felt like killing the barber? I know it was not seriious or may not be serious, but the very expression just for a haircut is actually something that shows, may be you have been reading Gita, but not actually understood.

 

There are so many people in India who does not even get their food or shelter and not only in India, in many parts of the world including US there are homeless people. Having said that you read Gita, what difference does it make between you and someone who has not read it, for the sake of getting angry with Barber or God for the sake of a bad hair cut. After all hair is going to grow in 15 days or a month's time, while people loose certain things in life permenantly in accidents like hand or legs.

 

Read the chapters of Gita from 12 to 18 several times until you stop getting worked up for little things or anything. Until you stop getting worked up, you have not actually understood Gita and you cant say that you were even ex-vaishnava. There cannot be an ex-vaishnava once someone has really understood Gita to a larger extent and start applying in his or her life.

One who has understood to a greater extent would not call himself as ex-vaishnava or future vaishnava.

 

Do you know why people shave their heads. its actually to humble themselves in front of The supreme. Of course most people do it as an offering for some material benefits.

Krishna says there are three modes of existence.

MOde of goodness, Mode of Passion and Mode of ignorance.

As long as one lives in mode of ignorance and passion you get worked up and this is not the stage of proper understanding of Gita. one who has overcome these things enter into mode of goodness.

 

Please read the chapters 12 to 18 again and again and again until you really start seeing everything with the same eye. I am not advising or suggesting as a lip service, but after so much of personal experience and self control I am telling you this.

[gopidust]

100%? If you surrendered 100% to Krishna and Krishna told you to chop your hair off you would do it. You make it sound like if you surrender to Krishna Krishna is going to become your servant instead. It is the other way around. You are supposed to serve Krishna and that will make you happy because you will LOVE him!

[Raghavan]

I guess you need to understand better. One who has understood Gita will not be breaking his head about a haircut or anything and everything will look trivial in the material world for him or her. Such person will not be a slave to his or her own senses and getting worked up or getting angry is actually slavery to our own sense of self ego that is affected when some one make fun.

 

Surrendering to Krishna is nothing but giving up the self ego and looking at everything without any sense of attachment towards that and keep thinking of Lord all the time and working with perfection in our devotion. Many people who chants or enter into devotional life, think of Krishna all the time, but how far they have actually given up the thought of self, self pleasure seeking stuffs, determines the percentage of actual devotion.

 

there are many people who get angry for everything inspite of their constant prayer and how much ever they read Gita, this does not mean Krishna does not bless them. Its actually they dont put of greater effort in their understanding.

 

BY the way does Krishna works as a servant to his pure devotee? Yes..this is what He exemplified in the incident of Sudhama for whom Krishna washes his foot and massages to get him relived of his long tiresome walking to see his friend Krishna. Although Sudhama got so much of material comforts after visiting Krishna, he always remains unattached with everything.

[Guest guest]

Sounds lika a hairy situation...be hair now...you almost commited hairy kiri...you became just another Tom, Dick and Hairy Krishna !

 

Hair today, gone to Maui...

[Guest guest]

for all your replies. I'll read BG again and see what happens.

 

Avinash, what could be a bigger problem than a bad haircut? True I've faced terrible problems before like buying the wrong shirt or trouser, losing CDs et al, but I took them in my stride, because at the time I didn't believe enough to get disappointed. Only after reading bg, it became intense and now the MOST terrible happened, and I am beginning to suffer. Hope you understand my predicament.

[Avinash]

I was talking about even more severe problems. Example:- Going without food due to lack of money, not having proper clothes to wear, not having house to live in etc.

[Avinash]

Having bad hair cut, buying wrong shirt or trouser, losing CDs - are these really terrible problems as you have mentioned?

 

There are people who are facing far far bigger problems. I fail to understand how you consider such trivial problems as terrible problems. I am not making fun at you. This is not in my nature. But what you have consider as terrible problems, I do not consider them as extremely trivial.

[Guest guest]

Arjuna uses many words to describe krsna, one of them being Kesava. I believe Kesava means long-haired? So I thought I could grow long hair to look cool, and guess what, I looked extremely beautiful with it. I am not kidding. I am an incredibly handsome man, but the summer heat was too much and it forced me to consider a haircut. And it resulted in a mess.

 

So I am left wondering that even though I've tried to please krsna with long hair, he hasn't appreciated my efforts, and instead tried to put me down by appointing an inexperienced guy to do my hair. That's unfair, isn't it? Suppose Arjuna had surrendered in the same manner and Krsna hadn't protected him from Karna's astra (where krsna manipulates the chariot), then surely Arjuna would've had the right to become angry, right? It is the same situation here. I am also like Arjuna facing a terrible crisis, and still krsna doesn;t come to the rescue. It is agonizing to think that a god who doesn't even protect me from barbers (barbarians, rather) is going to protect me from greater enemies. What am I to do? Do I just forget this and move on?

[Guest guest]

I haven't faced such big problems, but this is sort of big enough for me. I've always been too sensitive, and even a small thing like the wrong color shirt or stupid-loooking glasses could keep me up all night. It virtually kills me. You should've seen me right after the haircut, I was in tears, felt as if I was caught in the whirlpool. My folks were so shocked that they wanted to rush me to the hospital. But I mustered enough courage to go back to the barber and demand what is rightfully mine-cool hair. He came good the second time, but still I was very angry with krsna for letting me down.

 

How is it possible to go beyond such situations and sustain the love for god? Even trivial matters kill me, I am a flower-heart. I hate that. I want to be a man, but krsna has made me a sissy. WHY?

[Guest guest]

Thank you for the inspiring lecture. But you are wrong when you say that a man who's surrendered to krsna will NOT break his head over trivial matters. Haircut isn't trivial, it makes a man. I have such a lovely face, but it looked like a demon after the first haircut from that inexperienced barber.

 

People were laughing at me, pointing to my hair when I was coming back home ony my cool bike in cool sunglasses, because in my mind's eye, I was cool as ever. In my haste, I didnt even look in the mirror then, I was so confident that nothing could've gone wrong. But something did go awry, and I looked terrible, my hair couldn't be brushed in ANY direction whatsoever. Bot straight, no curls, not toward the sides, NOWHERE. It was horrible, how could you have the heart to say it was nothing to worry about?

 

Also to Gopidust who said one has to surrender 100% and expect nothing from krsna, that is not possible in the beginning. A devotee usually expects something from the lord. it is human nature. At least, krsna has to take care of a devotee's basic needs. Do you want me to suffer with low-quality life and yet think of krsna all the time? How is that possible?

[gHari]

Attachment.

 

A real man doesn't give a damn about how pretty he is. Renunciation. Such is our image of our heroes - rebel without a cause, Gandhi, Clinton. Soon you'll learn that all that respect you receive from having a good hair day, just doesn't mean anything. If baboons applaud, am I greater? That's called perspective - exposing the sham.

 

Wait until it becomes cars. We grew up thinking you are what you are by the size of your car. It takes several cool cars before we start to learn that we are the same folks no matter what we drive, wear or even how our hair appears. Some never get that far. This is the manager at McDonald's who acts like he is something great. They never get perspective.

 

Life is a bad Bollywood movie about Western pop idols. Break free. Beware of plastic. Buy only genuine parts.

 

[gopidust]

The point is if we are NOT 100% surrendered we get bad haircuts due to KARMA! Maybe you are afraid that because you read Bhagavad-Gita that now this is how Krishna is taking care of his devotees. It is a fact that sometimes Krishna takes away his devotee's material possessions in order to help them advance. If that is the case and this is how Krishna has started then there is nothing you can do. You cannot hang on to your material possessions and desires if Krishna wants to take them away he is just too powerful.

If we ARE 100% surrendered like the gopis then it doesn't matter what Krishna does to us we will just accept it if it makes Him happy.

/images/graemlins/laugh.gifOn the other hand maybe Krishna just gave you a little scare so you would take more shelter of Him. In that case it seems to have worked.

[Guest guest]

"Thank you for the inspiring lecture. But you are wrong when you say that a man who's surrendered to krsna will NOT break his head over trivial matters. Haircut isn't trivial, it makes a man. I have such a lovely face, but it looked like a demon after the first haircut from that inexperienced barber"

 

Doesn't seem like you understand what surrending your ego to the lord means. You have a big ego about your appearance, and thus, you are very vain. Maybe the Lord was trying to teach you a lesson about vanity, only you refused to listen?

[vanamali]

You know something, perhaps Krishna is trying to teach you something about beauty. Gandhi was bald, missing several teeth... is there a person more beautiful than Gandhi?

 

Krishna is very beautiful as a young cowherd boy, long hair, regal nose, cherry-red lips, ok! But think of Varaha avataram; Bhu devi (in the form of earth) was lost beneath the muck, and He became a hairy boar and dove in! Just imagine our lovely Krishna with a pig face, covered in coarse hair, body slathered in black moss and mud; and all for love! In my mind's eye I can see Bhu devi looking at Him pitifully, soaked to the core, trembling from fatigue. The love that flows between Them as They look at each other at that moment is so overwhelming... this is why Krishna is beautiful. His heart is so melting with love that He would do anything for His devotees, from great Ones like Bhumi Piratti, down to the common everyday devotee.

 

I think He probably is trying to show you what real beauty is, because the beauty of the physical body is bound to fade, if not by unfortunate barbershop mishaps, then by age and disease. If you can understand this now; if you can realize you are still beautiful without "cool hair" and that people will still love you if you're not "cool," then you will have a happy life, and meet old age and death with grace. Just go to the Lord with an open heart, and He will make you so beautiful that even if you are completely bald (as many are!) you will be BEAUTIFUL to the point where people will not be able to resist your loving smile and your warm, gracious attitude! Don't worry, everything is going to be OK!

[Guest guest]

I wish that my biggest problem in life was my hair. (But I have a sneaking suspicion that birth, death, old age and disease might be a tad bigger.)

[Guest guest]

Ishavasya Upanishad

 

This entire universe is pervaded by the Lord Hari, for the reason that it is dependent upon primordial nature, which in its turn is also pervaded by Him. He alone is thus independent. For this reason, enjoy whatever is given to you by Him, and do not seek wealth from any other source (since Hari alone is independent, do not worship others such as kings in hopes of wealth).

 

 

The worlds of eternal misery, covered with unremitting darkness, indeed, do they fall into without recourse, they who, having failed to realize the truth about the Lord (in spite of opportunity), persist in false knowledge.

 

 

(The Supreme is) completely free of fear, for being the primary Being; He is swifter than the mind, and cannot be fully comprehended (even) by the deities (headed by Brahma), while He knows all by His own nature, from beginningless time; though unchanging, staying as-is, He effortlessly overtakes all, no matter how they may run; to that Lord, Mukhya Prana dedicates all the actions performed by all creatures.

 

 

One who sees all animate and inanimate nature in the Supreme (for He exists outside them and is their support), and also sees the Supreme in all of them (for He exists in them, and is their controller from within), by this reason, he becomes free of fear and does not ever need to seek concealment.

 

 

For one who clearly understands that all beings exist in the Supreme, and that He exists within all of them (as their controller), and who thus sees the unity of the Lord as existing (without change) everywhere, what could possibly cause delusion, or sorrow? "to that person"

 

 

One who knows Visnu as Creator, and also as the Destroyer, for him, by knowledge of Him as Destroyer, he overcomes suffering, and by knowing Him as Creator, he obtains mukti.

[Guest guest]

Haribol. Here is a bad hair day. Back in the hippie daze, a very nice devotee I knew just whacked off his two-feet long surfer mane, I mean, this person had hair desired by the most grateful of all the dead, made alice cooper band members look like rednicks, had dreadlocks that made the smokiest of the rastas think that heile had returned in the flesh. But now he had a two foot long sikha, and he was quite renounced, a major sacrifice, indeed. But, he had a bad moment, while carefully braiding his new sikha, the tp, (a great devotee, a great siksa guru to all who ever knew him) snuck up on him with a very large pair of scissors, and WHACK!!!, eighteen inches of the sikha lay on the floor, nicely braided, but, not at all connected.

 

Even the devotee who was proud of having the nicest sikha in all of ISKCON thought this was very funny, and was relieved. Me too. Five years ago, I had the best unaffiliated sikha. Three white-boy dreadlocks hanging from the 50 cent-size spot on the sikha-site of my head. Even my rastafarian friends from the island reggaefest (Duncan, BC)thought that if scissors did touch the hair, my haircut was the best way. I whacked it all off, because I am not the sikha.

 

Haribol, ys, mahaksadasa

[Guest guest]

Ghandi must've been on permanent Aktins, explaining his thin frame and unsightly complexion. lol. I'd rather die than look like someone as hideous as all that. As a hIndu, I aspire to be hero like karna or arjuna, not some skinny, bald guy with no teeth. I assumed that hindu tradition teaches people to look, think and act like heroes, hence the desire.

 

If the body were superficial, then krsna wouldnt have given us one. There is a purpose for it, which is to look beautiful. Beauty is one of the gods that hindus worship, if I am not mistaken. That is why I am interested, not because I have a big ego. It is only due to my intense desire to practise hinduism, to be a good hindu. Hope you understand.

[Guest guest]

Yeah, I know old age, death are all bigger problems, but it is foolish to worry about them, they are inevitable. BUt haircut isn't beyond your reach, but still krsna doesn't help me wiht it, he doesn't give me cool hair. I have to suffer great shame and pain. That's what baffles me.

[Guest guest]

I want practicality, not philosophy. Philosophy doesn't help when the house is burning. You need to take effective action.

[Guest guest]

I once chopped someones dread-relic sikha, on the day he was to take initiation. He had just shaved up, and he was intending to keep his matted tuft. But I cut the hair for hari because Hari doesn't like dreads (it's in the NOD). The man decided I was his enemy then and there. Some people love their hair-symbol; if I had realized how much this guy was attached to his hair I wouldn't have touched it; I would have just suggested to Srila Gurudev that the man isn't ready for initiation.