RE: To Linda for answering the query about negativities getting in way

[Guest guest]

Linda wrote,

To make an analogy, I had a painting teacher once who said "art is 1

percent inspiration and 99 percent persperation," so I learned to

paint whether I felt like it or not, or whether I was inspired or

not. This was a tremendoud lesson.

Hi Linda,

This phrase held a lot of meaning for me. Usually I am just searching

for inspiration and tend to get frustrated when sometimes that does

not happen. And sometimes its just the question of reminding myself

that I need to let go and surrender. I understand (though I am not

able to apply it in practical life)surrender is the most beautiful

thing. It almost makes me feel like a child who just plays blissfully

trusting the mother completely. At any given moment instead of

struggling with the world just handing her the reins is beautiful

indeed.

Ruchi

nierika (AT) aol (DOT) com

[nierika (AT) aol (DOT) com] Saturday, February 05, 2005 8:17 AMTo:

Subject: Re: To Ruchi on

bhava and negativities getting in the way

Ruchi wrote:

I had another question too. If you do puja when you are not

reallyfeeling upto it, you do not have the bhava and you sit there

and allkinds of negativities are popping in your head, is it worth to

do it. Itmakes me feel very guilty. I say mother I am sorry, I do not

want tothink this way or that, but then another thought pops in my

mind. Itbecomes a struggle. Is their any merit in this kind of puja.

and thenagain is'nt using the merit word completely wrong. Let me

know yourthoughts on this.

Dear Ruchi ~ thank you for your thoughtful comments to my post. It is

helpful to know I am not the only one who has this problem. I think

partly, for me, it is a matter of attitude and focus. The more I

focus on my illness, the less I focus on other things I feel good

about, and the worse I feel. Same thing with negativities of any kind

~ the more focus I give them, the bigger it gets. Right now I am just

giving myself permission to do what I can do, whatever that may be.

This morning, it was making the round of my altar and saying good

morning to all the dieties and gurus there and then thanking God/dess

for another day and asking for the grace to live it well. Yesterday, I

did japa, and that was all I could do. But it felt very good doing it.

I think it is like meditation, which, in a way, japa becomes for me,

for the mantra often carries me into a state of No-thing-ness, that

state of fullness I mentioned previously.

So I think it would be true for puja too, even if I just picked a

small thing to do ~ when the negativities rise, just let them

go...don't hold them, push them away, feel bad about them. They are

just samskaras being released. Let them pass by like clouds and then

continue on. As for having the bhava, I wouldn't worry about it; I

believe that will come. To make an analogy, I had a painting teacher

once who said "art is 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent

persperation," so I learned to paint whether I felt like it or not,

or whether I was inspired or not. This was a tremendoud lesson. Right

now, with my spiritual practice, I am learning to accept myself being

able to do just what I am able to do and not feel bad if I can't do

more. Some people have told me that Maa has even said to them, start

where you are, start slow, then add as you feel able. I don't think

Maa would want us to "should" on ourselves. Many blessings and thanks

for giving me another opportunity to think about this ~ Linda