To Ardis on the Divine Feminine

[Guest guest]

Ardis wrote:

Although I am a woman, it is hard for me to trust in the Divine

Feminine. Even at the Mandir, it was much more difficult for me to

establish a relationship to Shree Maa than to Swamiji.I feel that it

is a very key part of my growth in this lifetime to be able to trust

and love the Goddess and thus to be able to love Myself. Thus, in a

strange way, my mother is also my teacher.

Dear Ardis ~ in my family, my father was the abuser. I saw my mother

as the "victim," and it was only after I moved to Oregon to live with

her that I saw how toxic her behavior was toward me. Because it was

more subtle than that of my father's, I think I shoved it under the

rug when I was growing up. Yet I never had the feeling that my mother

loved me. So I understand how you feel.

 

I have been on a quest for the divine feminine for most of my adult

life. First I studied the ancient goddess traditions, then immersed

myself in feminist Tarot decks. For awhile I practiced Wicca, and

then I was led to Ammachi, to Karunamayi, and finally to Shree Maa.

But I believe, like you, I have had difficulty completely opening my

heart, surrenduring, if you will. So I liked what you said about your

mother being your teacher. I will try to think of my mother that way

also. Jai Maa ~ Linda