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when you do sadhana to a certain degree of effectiveness, this can

happen:

 

you feel as if you are going insane. but no one knows it, except maybe

you most loving friends. it is like a huge itch you are refusing to

itch. it is like water boiling.

 

then when it is over, you remain kind to others. it is very quiet.

 

that is the magic of to do and to get. you are loosening from this

world. this is tapas.

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It is also like an abyss, walking into a dark cave, etc. Why would

anyone do this, the mind says. It is like the mind goes crazy inside a

big quiet space...but other parts are very very content. I think for me

it really becomes apparent in my total loss of interest in worldly

success even when it is sitting at my door. I am shaking my head

saying, but this makes no sense, I have NO interest. What am I to do?

Loving friends watch and wonder. Good thing they still love us. Om Jaya

Maa

 

, "Steve Connor" <sconnor@a...> wrote:

> when you do sadhana to a certain degree of effectiveness, this can

> happen:

>

> you feel as if you are going insane. but no one knows it, except maybe

> you most loving friends. it is like a huge itch you are refusing to

> itch. it is like water boiling.

>

> then when it is over, you remain kind to others. it is very quiet.

>

> that is the magic of to do and to get. you are loosening from this

> world. this is tapas.

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om jaya maa. your mind and heart go to the truth, you are a truth

pioneer.

 

, "sadumaa" <sadumaa> wrote:

> It is also like an abyss, walking into a dark cave, etc. Why would

> anyone do this, the mind says. It is like the mind goes crazy

inside a

> big quiet space...but other parts are very very content. I think

for me

> it really becomes apparent in my total loss of interest in worldly

> success even when it is sitting at my door. I am shaking my head

> saying, but this makes no sense, I have NO interest. What am I to

do?

> Loving friends watch and wonder. Good thing they still love us. Om

Jaya

> Maa

>

> , "Steve Connor" <sconnor@a...>

wrote:

> > when you do sadhana to a certain degree of effectiveness, this can

> > happen:

> >

> > you feel as if you are going insane. but no one knows it, except

maybe

> > you most loving friends. it is like a huge itch you are refusing

to

> > itch. it is like water boiling.

> >

> > then when it is over, you remain kind to others. it is very quiet.

> >

> > that is the magic of to do and to get. you are loosening from this

> > world. this is tapas.

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