relationship question for Swamijii

[Guest guest]

Pranams Swamiji!

 

I have another question to ask you if that is okay.

 

I am writing to ask your thoughts and blessings for a relationship

question. My current long-term boyfriend and I are considering

breaking up and I am wanting to approach the issue from as spiritual

a perspective as possible. He is a very kind, generous man who is

not overtly interested in spiritual disciplines and who is pretty

materialistic and "earthy". He is still wanting to live a very

social life that includes drinking as he is in a band. I am finding

our social life difficult and unfulfilling and have tried to detach

and not judge or desire and be as present and loving as I can.

However, although we love each other and have so much fun together

in simple ways, our day to day lives are really pretty separate now

and we wonder if our paths are too divergent. Also, our intimate

life has become non-existent for a number of reasons, one of which

is my seeming lack of interest in sex that I think is to a large

degree due to my readings about spirituality which have convinced me

of its dangers in spiritual living.

 

So my question is this: I would like to do whatever is best for

everyone and am wondering if God ever wants spiritual aspirants to

stay "out in the world" even if they have no sex drive? Would one

have to stay in relationship to just to fulfill karma ( apparently

my chart indicates a ton of relationship karma) even if they are

wanting to know God? Does God ever want aspirants to stay out in

the world to bring a different vibration to earthly situations,

people, and places, even if it may dilute the aspirants own

spiritual progress? Or is this last thought just the ego giving

itself a false sense of purpose? Is it generally "better" for an

aspirant to enter a monastic mode of living (whether self-designed

or in an ashram) if they can manage to release all desires for a

formal male-female human relationship? (I have long harbored a

desire to live and learn and progress spiritually within a sacred

male-female relationship, but wonder if it's better in general to

let that thought go if I can).

 

If you have any additional guidance for me for my current situation

in particular as well as the question of aspirants and relationsihps

in general, I would be grateful. I have read so much on the subject

and am confused: on one hand, I have read that a "spiritual" person

should not leave a non-spiritual person for that reason, but then I

have also read writings that indicate that a celibate existence is

essential for spiritual progress.

 

Thank you again, Swamiji, for your big-hearted guidance and time,

Blessings,

elizabeth

 

Shanti Shanti Shanti Om.