Intesting Situation

[Guest guest]

Namaste to all!

 

I have found myself in an interesting situation over the years. I

would like to hear other's thoughts and insights about it.

 

I have had the great good fortune to meet with and learn from many

wonderful spiritual traditions. I've spent time with Shree Maa and

Swamiji. I've spent time with the Gaudiya Vaishnava tradition. I've

spent time with Saiva Siddhanta Church. I've spent time with the

Vedanta Society. I've spent time with Swami Prakashanand Saraswati

and the International Society of Divine Love.

 

I've spent time with Chinese Buddhists. I've spent time with Jodo

Shinshu, Nichiren, Zen and Nyingma Buddhists. I've spent time with

Orthodox, Roman Catholic and Episcopalian Christians. I've briefly

looked into Taoism.

 

So obviously I am "searching." Ok...now what has been getting to me

is this: I have been so fortunate to access all these wonderful

traditions and sanghas and families of people...but I still find

myself traveling around from tradition to tradition and not ever

settling down and making myself at home and become intimate with one

tradition. When I first came to Devi Mandir when I was 19, it seemed

ok to be on a journey of discovery, but know I'm 36, I feel that I'm

still dabbling and am too much of a dilettante.

 

On one hand, I believe that I should make a commitment to one

tradition and one teacher and dive deeply into that practice. On the

other hand, (I always feel like I should have as many hands as Durga

Ma...) I feel that each tradition and each form of God has unique

gifts and a unique perspective and that by only focusing on one, I

would be cheating myself out of a beautiful tapestry of experiences.

 

On one hand, I feel that by always change my practice from one form

of God to another, I will never become intimate with any of the

forms.

 

On the other hand, I feel that I should relax and enjoy my unique

universal vision and do what I can do to promote harmony and

understanding between different religions.

 

*sigh* I apologize for sounding so neurotic and caught up in the

surface mind. I would be very interested to hear if others have had

similar experiences and how they settled on one tradition or how they

were able to integrate and create something universal and unique.

 

Thanks for your thoughts, time and input.

 

Neil in San Francisco

[Guest guest]

Hi Neil,

 

The first thing that struck me after I read your post was the idea that

you enjoy experiencing various spiritual teachings and idealogies. One

should not confuse that enjoyment with a desire to know God. It's not the

same thing. Its like people who like to read think that they could be good

writers. But in reality, they just like to read and probably would have

problems finding their own voice.

 

I know many people who claim to have a spiritual attitude but in reality

simply only enjoy thinking about spirituality. They like to play with the

ideas, and play with them is all they ever do.

 

Enjoying spritual concepts and reading spiritual books does not progress

one on a spiritual path. You cannot know God by studying books,

ideologies, or plopping in front of a hundred Gurus and listening to their

wonderful words.

 

To progress on a spiritual path one must commit oneself to God, wholly and

without any reservation or condition. It is then that She can come and

challenge your assertion that you have given yourself completely. Once you

have convinced Her of your devotion, She is there always and there is no

concept of distinction.

 

During Kali Yuga the test of your desire to know Her is long and pointed.

She does not come to just anyone for any reason. She only comes to those

who have shown their devotion, love, respect and desire to know Her.

 

You must say, "I'm interested in these teachings Maa, but I'm more

intersted in Knowing You." Then She may grant you the ability to see Her

within the texts and fuse the knowlege with wisdom.

 

Once you develop that attitude of awareness your life will change and you

will suddenly know what the difference is. That change is different for

everyone. For some She is very gentle. For others She is quite harsh. For

you it will be unique, because every relationship She forms is unique.

 

Once you have the Relationship, then She becomes your teacher, your Guru,

your Mother and Father, your Sister and Brother, and your Child. She will

teach you how to master your mind and body, how to affect peace in your

life and in the lives of those around you. She will test your devotion on

a Daily basis. In each and every moment you will be given a choice, Know

Goddess is Here ... or ... react to the stimulous that surrounds you. Its

a choice between awareness and a fog of doubt, confusion and reaction.

 

Shree Maa says, "If you have to think about something, think about God!"

 

And if you have to desire something, desire God.

 

Knowing Her is before you, all you have to do is make a constant

commitment, focus, and devote yourself to Her.

 

OM AIM HRIM KLIM CHAMUNDAYE VICHE SWAHA