Matt to Amanda

[Guest guest]

Hi Amanda!

 

You wrote:

> Dear Dharma,

>

>Would you please tell Matt I'd love to correspond with him ?

 

I also am eager to correspond with other people who understand something of

this process -- 99% of the people I know have never heard of kundalini, and

if they have they think it's some kind of exotic sexual position. :-))

(Sigh) It gets lonely ...

>His experiences are truly beautiful and so very

>rare in the online world of K experiences, where

>the majority show the individual being completely

>or partially overrun by the energy and far from

>being able to handle the changes that take place

>as gracefully or with as much surrender as

>Matt.

>

>It seems this has been a type of

>awakening that has gone very well,

>quickly and almost effortlessly lead to

>a great trust and love for the energy and

>great spiritual unfoldment,

 

Yes, that is what has happened. Thank you for honoring the process with your

understanding!

>a process worthy

>of a yogi.

 

Well ... um ... actually I have no idea what I'm doing. It's all been

instinct until Dharma arrived and began teaching me a few things.

>It is very rare indeed

>to read about such awakenings,

>especially on the net.

 

You show me what the value of my experiences could be for others. I have

read that it can be terrifying and unpleasant for some people. Gopi Krishna

says that happens when you resist.

 

I do not know why I did not resist. I guess because I had really come to the

end of my ego-rope -- I didn't want to be a part of the world at all any

more.

 

This was in the last few years of a fifteen-year process of staying with a

woman I loved but didn't want to be with because of the things she did. I

took the unfashionable approach of staying because we had a child -- if I

left I was afraid she would get custody just because she was the mother, and

then she would screw up her daughter much more deeply and permanently than

she had been able to screw me up. I am a fairly strong, resilient person --

stronger than her -- but my daughter was a different matter.

 

When my daughter got old enough to survive without me there to intervene I

moved out into the woods. I honestly did not want to come back. So I was

living in a state of mind where I really wanted something else to take the

place of human relationships for me.

 

My surrender then was one not of wisdom but despair. How often this drives

us out into the darkness where our answers lie! And yet it seems hardly the

act of the true yogi ... But in this case the result was the same.

 

Perhaps now I know that, I could convey the value of that absolute surrender

to other people whose kundalini has awakened in spite of their wishes rather

than because of them.

 

Kundalini is what the Christians call the Holy Spirit, what the Jewish

people call Shekinah. It is the experience of God. The mystics from these

and other traditions that do not include kundalini per se still describe

kundalini-esque experiences. It is unmistakeably the same thing.

 

The simplest way to think about it, is that nobody wants to piss God off. If

He/She/It calls, you would be wise to answer!

 

<snip>

>>Talking to God: An Open Letter

>>

>>"God, I have lost control of my life. I

>>don't know what to do next. Everything I have attempted is in ruins. If

You

>>exist at all, now would be a really good time for You to start talking to

>>me."

>>

>>And I heard in my mind, quite clearly, a woman's voice. She said, "What

did

>>you want to talk about?"

>

>LOL ! What a beautiful surrender and what a

>beautiful awakening !

 

Again, thank you so much for feeling that. It was one of the most stunningly

beautiful moments in my life -- it was so simple, but everything turned

upside down in a moment ... But it's so hard to convey that in dry words ...

>>I did not hallucinate or hear voices -- in fact, I never have. Instead,

>>these were like waking dreams -- just like my encounters with My Lady, but

>>very strong and vivid.

>

>Yeah, that's how visions are, hovering at the

>edge b/n sleep and waking.

 

Are they? You encourage me -- somehow I thought when people had "visions"

that meant they actually saw things the way we see anything else.

>>If I tell them I am having visions they just phase out, you know?

>>Their eyes glaze over.

>

>LOL ! That sure is true.

 

It is a sad commentary on American society. Somehow we have lost our

direction. The subsitutes have become the reality for so many people.

>>But if I tell them I have become sensitized to the local electromagnetic

>>field in a way partly voluntary and partly involuntary, and that this

>>triggers mild but distinct paranormal experiences, they are very

interested!

>>They want to hear more.

>

>It's a back way in behind ppl's

>anti religious concepts and ego views

>and present something in a format which

>they can accept.

 

Yes, it sounds like science, so it must be OK. Everybody knows how strange

science can be! But it all must be true, because the scientists said so.

 

Of course that is one of the myths of civilized society, and I feel a little

guilty using it to win people's trust and attention. But in fact this _is_

science, kundalini isn't just vapors, it is a specific set of things that

happen in the physical world to our physical bodies -- and to our souls ...

:-)

>>My daughter Emily thinks it is a non-question: she sees no reason why we

>>have to distinguish between God and an electromagnetic field. She is

>>comfortable with the notion that it is both at once. Dharma says she's

>>right.

>

>I very much agree with all of you.

 

Great! That clears a ground for discussion -- if we all see this can be

science and the Sacred at the same time. :-)))

>I have also read a lot of Mr. Persinger's

>work and respect him as a neuroscientist and

>scholar. What he has done is breakthrough

>material and very interesting indeed.

 

I would like to know more about his work. I have read about it on Internet

sites but have only read one actual article by him, which I could barely

comprehend it was written in such dense scientific jargon. Can you

characterize the breakthrough aspects of it in layman's language? Since I am

not a physical scientist myself I don't know which parts of it were really

revolutionary or ground-breaking.

>Nevertheless, he has never heard of the "teaching"

>that God is energy and thus God is vibration,

>including light and electromagnetism.

>

>God is the cosmos and the Self and it is

>expressed as energy.

>Countless Indian sources attest to this

>view of God.

 

Yes, and scientists who do not see that something can be science and Sacred

at the same time don't pay any attention to those sources. The Tao of

Physics was published a long time ago now -- but it seems to have been

"preaching to the choir" ...

>I myself had severe problems with the God

>concept when starting out on the K path

>18 odd months ago, holding Mr. Persinger's

>views of the complete sceptic at heart.

>

>Nevertheless, I had been trained in the natural sciences and there the

>maxim is

>"Everything is energy and conservation

>of such".

>By hearing theories of a non dual "God"

>/ "Self", the road to a combination

>b/n the concept of energy and Self was not

>long and fully acceptable for my then very

>closed mind.

 

Yes, why should God be more incomprehensible to science than to the mystic?

There is a political agenda in there somewhere -- science feeds our need to

control Nature instead of live within its design, and if there is a God of

course that is all delusion. I believe even if God is outside of our

understanding, we can understand things like the medium through which we

experience this mystery -- and kundalini is part of that medium.

>>This commentator says that Persinger is making the same mistake: just

>>because the spiritual experiences happen as the result of a complex

>>electromagnetic phenomenon in the brain doesn't mean the brain is

generating

>>them. It could be a receiver, like a TV or radio receiver.

>

>Exactly. Persinger et al measure the effects

>of the waves, and with it they can simulate

>spiritual states, thus "proving" that

>religious experience is in our brains only.

>He takes little into account the basic and

>most underlying reasons why ppl can experience

>such states outside of a simulated high

>energy el.magnetic field.

 

Yes, it is a case of the investigator proving a conclusion which was

embedded in the way he asked the question in the first place. Actually quite

unscientific :-)) but every great mind has its weakness ... Persinger's weak

point seems to be God. God would seem to have the advantage over Dr.

Persinger, since God presumably is prepared to admit that the Dr. exists --

and can therefore deal with him ...

>>The sense of love and Sacred Presence can be so

>>strong that I come near to tears.

>>

>>She is my Mother, my Lover and my Wife.

>

>This really is the telephone line to

>God. )

>

<snip>

>>Somehow I had become tiny, I looked up into Her

>>eyes. She gave me Her nipple and I drank Her milk like a new-born infant.

I

>>fell asleep snuggled against Her breast, feeling Her arms supporting me

>>against Her body.

>

>It is said that yogis live and rest in the

>arms of God like a child lives in the arms

>of its mother.

>What you describe here may be the feeling of

>immense and boundless reverence and caring

>love that is transmitted and exchanged

>b/n God / Goddess and the open minded / open

>souled / surrendered individual.

>I have experienced similar states of directly

>being fed by the energy and this is what I take it to be.

 

Yes, I think She used this image / experience to convey that sense of

boundless compassion and love to me. She knows it is an image that moves me

deeply. Being a baby in its mother's arms is a way of understanding what it

means to be protected and cared for by God.

 

<snip>

>

>>I suppose I could

>>take a human lover again but it wouldn't be the same! Now I have

experienced

>>the real thing ...

>

>Yes, what humans are and what humans search

>for in a partner is often

>something very different than this.

>I also feel that a human would be close to

>a second best. It is not what I want.

>I now understand how monks could live

>without a human partner.

>

>Nevertheless, I have felt a lot for ppl

>with an obvious high amount energy and good

>contact with it, then there has been heart

>exchange of energy and that has been very

>blissful.

 

I have not met anyone else like this "in the flesh," but I can see from my

long-distance work with Dharma that such people are kindred spirits.

>>The part of me that thought it had my life under control -- what they call

>>the super-ego -- is so confused! But there is another part, a new part of

me

>>I never knew before, which is absolutely sure of the Path. It takes its

>>guidance not from within me but from somewhere outside. I trust it and

>>follow it, for it is the part of me which is part of Her. All I know of it

>>for sure is that it leads me closer and closer to God.

>

>This is surrender.

>

>Thank you very much for letting us read a very

>beautiful example of it. We can all learn

>from your experiences and the way you have

>handled the spiritual process.

>

>Far from everyone has met the events with

>as much flexiblity and complete trust as you

>have.

 

Thank you for your openness and acceptance! It is a solitary path, or it has

been for me so far. I would like to continue this correspondence. Maybe I

should join up with Kjade again ... I only bailed out because I couldn't

handle the volume of e-mails :-))) But an awful lot has happened to me since

then. With Dharma's counsel I have really undergone a personal

transformation. Perhaps it is time to come back to the larger circle ...

:-)))

>Thank you also to Dharma for posting this

>letter to the list.

 

Yes, thank you, Dharma!

>Much love,

>

>Amanda.

 

 

LOL (Love Out Loud!)

 

Matt