Samadhi

[Guest guest]

Thank you Bob, Wim, Harsha, Jessica and everybody else for your prompt

and beautifulanswers.I did read a lot of yoga literature and practice

meditation in the lasteight years, but the recent developments are

possible because of theshaktipat of my guru, first received four

years ago. Then, I experienced theopening of Brahmarandra - top of

the spine nadi and as a mirror event, theawakening of Kundalini. In

time it became more and more subtle and blissbecame a part of me.

This made me feel that body is sacred and I enjoy in asecret way

every move, the simple act of walking, dressing up or doing

anyphysical activities while being in this state of bliss. However I

was not ina nondual state, the normal dual mind continued to operate

as well,permanently.The 'sound' made me do it.Recently I made a

breakthrough because of concentration of the permanentsubtle sound.

We discussed a lot about this sound in the list. It seems thatalmost

everybody hears it in complete silence. By focusing on this sound

Igot the feeling that there was no meditation, there was no object

ofmeditation or witness, there was only a flash of blissful pure

energy, notlocalized in space but everywhere. This state lasted for a

few seconds, butI entered again and again in it.There are some effects

in the 'after meditation' period. I feel very limitedeven by the mere

appearance of a thought or by choosing to make a simplephysical move.

It is not pleasant to loose this state. On the other hand,there was

something that made me stop meditation after some time. It was

asudden wish to stop, it came from the heart chackra, I felt this

distinctly.This suggests that I need some serious getting used to

this new way ofliving, because this wish to stop is a impregnation of

the mind that must beerased through meditation.There is a strong

sensation that this is different from whatever I didbefore. Now it is

serious, there is no way of avoiding what must be done.This scares me

in some degree because it is like dying. I feel I amdissolved and

this is like saying good bye to the world I knew untilnow...Well, my

life is ahead, I have lots of time to get over this initialmoment

)P.S. Sometimes I start a conversation or I put a question not

because I wantto obtain information but because I love the

extraordinary reaction I getfrom you. I sort of 'stimulate' a

conversation Love you.Horia>I feel the normal state of

consciousnes to be a somehow "compressed" and>much more limited

state of being and myself, in which the silence and>absolute balance

of the larger Self somehow manages to get lost in the>clutter of

mental movies, desires and physical action. Something

remains>though, and I hope maybe I'll also one day be able to switch

smoothly from>one mode to the other.Same here, Miguel Mouse.