If only/Gloria

[Guest guest]

This is a great post Gloria, thanks.

 

love,

 

andrew

>

>Gloria Lee <glee:

>

> Dear Mark and Victor,

>

> Hey, no piggy-back rides! Sometimes what we need to do is just stare reality

in

> the face without blinking. Someone wise once said something like, for better

or

> worse, THIS is the coliseum you have chosen to wake up in. (And hey, that it

> seems lousy conditions is probably all the more reason to suspect it was my

> choice. LOL) Well Mark, if you want no fear and a nice cushy landing, right

> there is the cause of (seemingly) not getting anywhere. If you go to the edge

of

> all that you already know and take one more step, of course it will feel

fearful

> to go into the unknown and let go. And it's only a dead end place, if you do

> stop. Don't we all know the drill on the ego and attachment, so there is more

to

> this than just knowing about it. Does it help any to say that the "I" is your

> little tattered security blanket you drag around with you and just about as

> useful. And have you ever actually managed to stop anywhere? I can't, tho not

> looking for a final resting place, any old oasis will do me. "It's always

> something. If its not one thing, it's another." as rosanne roseanna danner

used

> to say.

>

> Like just when has life ever stopped to listen to yours or my preferences?

Here

> is one of my all-time favorite quotes:

>

> Life cannot wait until the sciences have explained the universe

> scientifically. We cannot put off living until we are ready. The most salient

> characteristic of life is its coerciveness: It is always urgent ... without

> any possible postponement. Life is fired at us point-blank.

> -- Jose Ortega Y Gasset

>

> So, what do I know really about anyone else? Let me just venture a guess,

based

> on what I know about myself. This message has gotten a lot more dramatic than

> what I started out to say. The great tales of sudden awakenings and zen

satoris

> do somehow lead a person to wonder if there is just some one step to take that

> for ever afterwards will make life a piece of cake, a walk thru the park. But

> you know, just suppose you have already had that satori... well, then it will

be

> time to put one foot in front of the other and go on to chop wood and carry

> water. You will still have the career move to make, Mark..and Victor will

still

> have his wife and all the other conditions to deal with. For me, behind all

> this is some desire to escape life's burdens and difficulties, or a wish to be

> infallible and trouble free. ..wouldn't it be nice, tho? Hey, if you do figure

> that out, please let me know. Anyway, I think we are only kidding ourselves if

> we think we have postponed anything...life is a' happening anyway.

>

> Victor, you are so much better than you seem to realize. I mean you keep

saying,

> all that you did got you nowhere..but the man I met was so kind and

> compassionate and understanding..was that all an accident? I'm not

unsympathetic

> with the feeling you are expressing here..it's very familiar to me too..I just

> wanted to remind you that this too could even be good news. I mean running

out..

> Because the more I am thinking, oh if I just read that book or do this

> technique, then I will have it made and have it my way. But life is not Burger

> King, is it..damn. Victor, I am in the same boat. (See Mark, you already have

a

> boat!!) I have lost track of how many times and in how many ways, you have

> expressed that acceptance of what_is is a key understanding and being in the

> moment.. and relaxing, etc..see, I think you do already know and understand so

> much, it maybe just isn't giving you the results you wanted or meeting your

> expectations? Well, I yell, "let go, let go" at myself rather often, so maybe

I

> am still just talking to myself. I don't think this is supposed to be easy.

>

> With love,

> Gloria

>